Friday, April 25, 2003

I have exams right now. You probably knew that. Most have heard my cries of agony across the galaxy. There will be no rocking and/or rolling this week. If you want some of that then your best bet is to hop a plane and go to Coachella.

Tuesday, April 22, 2003

Awwww! Bush and Blair singin' a love duet... Bless! Isn't technology a beautiful thing?

Monday, April 21, 2003

Nina Simone is dead. She died of natural causes at her home in France. She was 70.

Sunday, April 20, 2003

  • To help celebrate Easter Sunday (or 4/20 for you non-religious, ganga-smokin' folk) I'm recommending you check out the latest Rather Good addition: The Flying Viking Kittens want to take you to a Gay Bar! Woot Woot! Whatever you do, avoid The Spongmonkeys like the plague! They scare me!
  • If it is on the internet it must be true! Meg White is a robot!
  • Thursday, April 17, 2003

  • Yeah... Usually it’s not too healthy when you lose feeling in your limbs Sam... Interpol's drummer has been hospitalized. Send him a Get Well Card!
  • Courtney Love’s solo album has been named “America’s Sweetheart”. At least she still understands irony.
  • HELLS YEAH! BBC 6 Music will be airing a bunch of great bands covering Smiths tunes to celebrate the 20th anniversary of the release of the band’s first single ‘Hand In Glove’. Woot woot! Listen up to hear The Thrills cover 'Last Night I Dreamt Somebody Loved Me', Ed Harcourt singing 'Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want' and Nada Surf doing 'There Is A Light That Never Goes Out'. Yayness!
  • I’m certain “The Last Party: Britpop, Blair And The Demise Of English Rock” will all be as good as this juicy excerpt. Britpop, oh how I love you so... Even after all these years...
  • Ryan Adams is a total crackhead but the boy made a good point (circa February 28): “Pigeons – nothin’ but flyin’ rats”. So true. Especially post-NYC rock'n'roll adventure.
    However I think our boy might have been on the drugs when he followed up on March 18th with the comment “Cottage cheese – nothin’ but flyin’ rats”.
    Hrmmm. Get off the crack Ryan.
    PS: I still love you Ryan. I wanna be your girlfriend and have your crack babies.
    In case you haven't already heard... I went away on a rock'n'roll adventure on a bus across the United States of Whatever to see some rock bands play in New York City and such.
    Good times were had by all.
    Stories and anecdotes may or may not follow.
    I will only leave you with this... ROCK'N'ROLL MUTHAFUCKERS!

    Tuesday, April 08, 2003

    The man... The legend... FUCK HAIR!!!

    Fuck Hair: also known as “cool as fuck hair”. A hairstyle (if you can call it that) that is characterized my shaggy, choppy layers and sometimes chunky highlights. It is meant to look like you’ve had a good fuck and just rolled outta bed. For visuals please see The Cooper Temple Clause.

    The man we call Fuck Hair was named after his signature hairstyle. I came to refer to him as Fuck Hair so much that others soon followed suit and he quickly became a legend among both emo and indie kids around campus.

    The Fuck Hair highlight of the year was when the following ad was placed in the “Unclassifieds” section of the February 4th issue of the Brock Press… Fuck Hair had a fanclub!


    Fellow Peers,
    I hear he’s kind of a jerk, but if anyone manages to get it on with the sexy film TA with the glasses, DETAILS would be appreciated. He’s fucking hot.
    Les Femmes

    But then, suddenly, in the middle of March, tragedy struck. Fuck Hair cut his hair. We lost out beloved 7th member of the Brock University branch of The Cooper Temple Clause. A tragic day indeed. There were looks of sadness on all the young, indie girl’s faces. Although he lost his namesake hairdo, and became simply Fuck and/or Hair, we decided that he shall forever be known and remembered fondly as Fuck Hair.
    The past 8 months have been more than amusing… But now it’s time to wave goodbye. Ladies and gentlemen,

    The Best of Fuck Hair
    Here’s what we know about the most entertaining Film 1F94 T.A. that an indie girl could hope for.

  • He’s sooo very emo in appearance. Extreme lankiness. Scruffy hair. Tight denim jackets with pins for obscure bands. Converse All-Star sneakers. Fancy scarves. The emo’est argyle sweaters. Thick glasses. Bless.
  • He’s a B.C. orphan (i.e. he’s all alone, his family is in B.C.).
  • He lost his watch. He borrowed his girlfriend’s watch and lost hers too.
  • He consumes massive amounts of coffee. One day all the caffeine made him paranoid and he became convinced someone stole his coffee.
  • He wore leg warmers.
  • He has crushes on Selma Blair and "Margot Tenenbaum".
  • He likes grilled cheese sandwiches, yellow highlighters, and using the word "hankering".
  • He once used the phrase "backwater assfuck town in Alberta".
  • He’s a total music snob.
  • I got mad when he told me that he hates The Vines and The Music and that he thinks Sahara Hotnights are weak.
  • I decided he was ace again when I found out he digs Interpol, The Sights and other Detroit shtuff.
  • He has a girlfriend so at least his hairstyle is authentic.
  • He used to know the Hot Hot Heat guys back when he was in B.C. He lived in the same building as one of ‘em as well.

    CHOICE QUOTES
    “I do NOT frequent whore-houses in Niagara Falls… I know that’s what you’re thinking!”
    “Sometimes my mind goes all wacky – it’s all the coffee!”
    “Any boy who wasn’t especially popular in high school has read the book… Not including myself… I was very popular… Football quarterback…Lots of dates to the prom…” – on ‘The Catcher in the Rye’
    "Don't be led by what's in you pants cos in the end you're going to get fucked - and not literally!” – His advice to men.
    “Aha! Fuck You! That’s not what that is… Jackass!”
    “Now I kinda feel like a creepy sex-ed teacher… Whatever gets you off… That’s what we’re here for!” – After discussion on the “fucked-up, creepy gynecologist” and “boys who can’t keep it in their pants” in High School (the film).
    “So he’s kinda a bit of a fuckhead huh?”
    “The guy’s hot and his sister’s super-fuckin’ hot!”
    “Do these people of Flint give a flying fuck about Miss America? … Now I’m sure she’s a very successful porn actress in the San Fernando Valley or something like that… That’s what all former Miss America’s become.”
    “Badminton’s a fine sport. I’ve played it 7 or 8 times in my life and enjoyed it each time!” – On sports

    R.I.P. Memories of FUCK HAIR

  • Sunday, April 06, 2003

    Harvard Scholars: Geniuses or just like any other University student?
    Example A... Debates of Artistic Value in Rock Music: A Case Study of the Band Weezer, 1994-2001.
    (If anything its worth checkin’ out for his use of chartsengrafs and everything!)

    Saturday, April 05, 2003

  • Eugene Mirman is very funny despite, or maybe because of, his creepy childhood photo… And be sure to check out his ode to The Blizzard of 2003!
  • We hate Canada because Ice Storm 2003 made us miss Ikara Colt and Sahara Hotnights! Yes, it was 3 days ago and yes I am still bitter.
  • OK Go are on MAD TV tonite! Set those VCR’s!
  • Woo woo! Apparently I’ve been living under a rock (or a mountain of assignments) because I’ve just realized there was a brand-spankin-new, super-foxy Brendan Benson site just for UK fans! It’s luverly and has lots of pretty pictures! Dig it like soil kids!
  • WHACKAJACK! Fun with a mallet!” on the NME website! It’s bloody hard but I’m more of a Stripeout fan anyways…
  • Dig into Melody Nelson’s site before she gets all famous and stuff when everyone sees Shawn from Stellastarr* wearing her pin on Carson Daly April 10th.
  • War continues to ruin everything… Electric 6 are no longer releasing “Gay Bar” – at least until they make a few war-friendly changes… It’s a good thing too cos I’m sure that they wouldn’t want to be held responsible for a bunch of people going out to gay bars and starting nuclear wars and all that jazz…
    PS: Oh ya and Electric 6 are playing a show tonite with a band called “The Fucking Sparklies”… Sounds promising!
  • Wednesday, April 02, 2003

    Yippee! John Cameron Mitchell and Stephen Trask are releasing a charity album of cover tunes from and inspired by Hedwig And The Angry Inch. Ladies and gentlemen THIS is guaranteed to be the “the tribute to end all tributes” and it’s for a great cause! Some of the foxy indie artists that have signed on and the songs they’ve chosen:
  • Rufus Wainwright (Origin of Love)
  • Sleater-Kinney & Fred Schneider (Angry Inch)
  • Frank Black (Sugar Daddy)
  • ”The Bens”: Ben Folds, Ben Kweller & Ben Lee (Wicked Little Town – Tommy Version)
  • Imperial Teen (Freaks)
  • Bob Mould (Nailed)
  • Yoko Ono (Hedwig's Lament/Exquisite Corpse)
  • They Might Be Giants (The Long Grift)
  • The Breeders (Wicked Little Town – Hedwig Version)
  • Jonathan Richman (Origin of Love – Reprise)
  • Cyndi Lauper (Midnight Radio)
  • And maybe even a new song! Woo woo!
  • It was only a matter of time before the next storm of controversy hit...

    Tuesday, April 01, 2003

  • Today being April Fools Day and all... I feel that now is the appropriate time to inform you that I'm pregnant with a rock-star’s lovechild.
  • I lurve Interpol and their swanky styles but “How To Survive The War In Style”? Come on!
  • Teen People ((stifle your laughter please)) says Craig Nicholls is bad because "The Vines' singer drinks, smokes tons of pot and got into a fight onstage with his bandmate"... Oooh! Rebel rebel!
  • Like The Walkmen before him, Brendan Benson has given the okay for his song "Tiny Spark" to be used in the new Saturn Ion commercials... And the indie-fication of television commercials begins…
  • Happy Elephant Day all you candy-cane children!
  • Q. Should I rock in the body or in the soul?
    A. Rock lives chiefly in your soul, but if you take your body along it will be forever grateful.

    Leslie Harpold + A Brief Catechism of Rock Shows = Absolute genius! Harpold succeeds in justifying the religion of rock n roll... I only wish I had written it first! (Props to Melody Nelson for the link!)